Yosemite Sam Fathered Sheikh?

Speculated upon in a previous report was that Khalid Sheikh Mohammed allows only a single recent photo of himself because he is envious of the sumptuous lifestyle of the happy Americans. His envy has caused him to retaliate by denying more photos of himself. (“Surly Sheikh Denies Photos,” http://www.shout.net/~bigred/SurlySheikh.html)

What else can we discover about the surly Sheikh? It has been noticed by Conspiracy Nation how Khalid Sheikh Mohammed bears a striking resemblance to Yosemite Sam. Suppose Yosemite Sam, known for his foul temper, is somehow related to the surly Sheikh? What if Khalid Sheikh Mohammed is the unacknowledged child of Yosemite Sam?

Much is known about Yosemite Sam, unlike his presumed son, the surly Sheikh. Yosemite Sam is known to use aliases, such as “Chillicothe Sam” and “Shanghai Sam.” His fierce temper manifests as a “slow burn,” mimicking the build-up in resentment against the happy Americans experienced by his presumed son.

During World War II, Yosemite Sam was drafted into the US Army Air Corps. This forced service as well as his assigned duty of lowly mascot may have served as a focus for Yosemite Sam's already foul temper. Did he pass on to his presumed son, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, a bitter hatred of Americans, formed during his mascot days?

According to the Wikipedia reference, Yosemite Sam will go to ludicrous lengths just to "get even". This trait is also manifested in his presumed son, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed.

In his later years, Yosemite Sam became a professor and taught at Acme Looniversity. There, he held classes in Firearms and “Anvilology”, the study of falling anvils. His presumed son, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, is also said to be an intellectual.

And so, to sum up, besides a resemblance in appearance and temperament (nature, in the psychological parlance), we also find similarity of ideology (nurture, in the psychological parlance). With so little known about Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, due to his incommunicado status, theorizing must be relied upon. The nature and the nurture both fit. Is Yosemite Sam the unacknowledged father of Khalid Sheikh Mohammed?

(Preceding is a satire and not literally true.)

Conspiracy Nation

http://www.shout.net/~bigred/cn.html