(Melchizedek Communique, MC050511) It was to have been a sacred ceremony. Barack "El Guapo" Obama was to have said, "People of Santa Poco, I, El Guapo, have saved you from Osama bin Laden."

But then various Osamas began to be sighted, right there at the sacred ceremony!

A trio of "conspiracy theorists" had earlier asked the people of Santa Poco, "What is it you really do well?"

"Hmmm... Hmmm..." replied the people of Santa Poco to the trio of "conspiracy theorists" known as "The Three Amigos."

At last, one of the villagers said, "We can sew."

The Three Amigos devised a plan. "Sew, sew like the wind!" urged Ned Nederlander, one of The Three Amigos.

Only a few hours later, Barack "El Guapo" Obama and his band came riding into town for the sacred ceremony. But then, from behind a corner, Osama bin Laden appeared! "El Guapo, he is over there!" exclaimed Joe "Jefe" Biden.

But that Osama ducked into a building. Yet in an instant, another Osama bin Laden was seen emerging from a taxicab and running into a restaurant. "Now he is over there!" yelled "Jefe" Biden to "El Guapo" Obama.

Before too long, Osama bin Ladens were appearing everywhere, it seemed! "Adios, El Guapo!" cried El Guapo's band as they turned tail and ran off. "Traitors!" screamed El Guapo. "I am still here, El Guapo," boasted Joe "Jefe" Biden.

As it turned out, the "conspiracy theorists" had won the day. The people of Santa Poco had sewn together a plethora of Osama bin Laden costumes with which they had stupefied Barack "El Guapo" Obama and his band. Like Elvis sightings, Osama bin Laden sightings had begun to multiply. Soon, it was being whispered, "Is Osama really dead?"